So Jayne asks....
What were your old food habits like? What were you like before embarking on this journey to become a healthier version of yourself? How did you feel?
Was there anything you struggled with but have over come?(etc addictions soft drinks, chocolates are some examples) How did you do it? Was it just a decision you made? Or did you do it slowly?
Now I would like you tell me and maybe tell others that aren't on the journey what has changed? What are your new eating habits like? How do you feel now? What is the difference? Tell us how it is changing your life? It can be hard at times! But tell us why it has been and continues to be worth it?
I haven't written a Shoe Story ( see www.shehascuteshoes.com for other Shoe Stories and just what they are ) for a while so I thought this might be a different way to do this post today. I hope you like it.
We sat on the steps, just the two of us. It was quiet there and no one would bother us for the hour or two we could just be ourselves. We didn't have to explain why we couldn't do extra classes or why our school uniform was plain and common and there was no need for a hat or a blazer.
We had already been to the fish and chip shop downstairs to get our hot chips with salt and vinegar and we sat with our nose buried in a book we could escape. Opening the white butchers paper slowly, breathing in that comforting smell of the hot, fried potato and the crisp smell of the vinegar that was sharp on our tongue.
After we had eaten them slowly, we ate a packet of chips and we kept reading and hiding. Salt and Vinegar, Chicken or Plain. Sometimes Burger Rings. Never cheese Twisties lest she be asked why we didn't audition for the TV commercial.
These foods became our friends. They were fat friends in comfort food clothing and would contribute to the disconnection between the two of us.
We just weren't able to make that connection yet.
Size 3 Bloch Ballet Shoes xx
Then....
Open the garage door.
Don't hit the side of the garage.
Careful! Careful!
Remember to lock the car. Lock the garage door.
Don't forget the "meds".
Upstairs.
Don't turn on the lights.
Slowly. Carefully. No sudden movements.
Drink some Diet Coke. Take the tablets.
Go into the bedroom. Take the "other meds".
She unties me and I watch her as she eases herself onto the bed. It's dim in here so it's hard to see. We are usually together, she and I but when she's like this, it's like I am watching her from a distance.
Carefully she places a cool pack on her head, picks up a book she has read numerous times and opens a large packet of plain chips.
Carefully she places a cool pack on her head, picks up a book she has read numerous times and opens a large packet of plain chips.
Once she has finished her "other medicine" she leans over and shoves the empty packet under the bed. Out of sight. Out of mind. Out of guilt. Closes her eyes and sleeps.
I stay by the side of the bed and wait. This is not the first time. Nor will it be the last time we do this.
Size 5 Aqua Chucks xx
I remember the day when she stalked those Vegemite Chips.
They stayed in the flat for weeks because she decided they would be our birthday treat.
But when she saw ( I refuse to say we! ) those chips she knew that they were only going to be around for a short amount of time - it was a choice that had to be made.
Believe it or not we weren't tempted to eat them. And our birthday came and went and those chips stayed in their packet. We ate them over a week on four separate occasions, putting them in a special bowl and enjoying each one.
It was a little victory. We would have our setbacks over the coming months but it was a giant leap forward. Somehow the lesson stuck too. They lost some of their power that day.
Little win.
x Light Aqua Havianas
And now....
Open the garage door.
Don't hit the side of the garage.
Careful! Careful!
Remember to lock the car. Lock the garage door.
Don't forget the "meds".
Upstairs.
Don't turn on the lights.
Slowly. Carefully. No sudden movements.
Drink some Diet Coke. Take the tablets.
Go into the bedroom.
She unties me and I watch her as she eases herself onto the bed. It's dim in here so it's hard to see. We are usually together, she and I but when she's like this, it's like I am watching her from a distance.
Carefully she places a cool pack on her head, picks up a book she has read numerous times and reads.
Carefully she places a cool pack on her head, picks up a book she has read numerous times and reads.
Sometimes, although not every time she eases herself out of bed and makes a Vegemite sandwich or some plain popcorn with a fair amount of salt and gingerly brings that back to her bed to eat before the medication does it's job and she falls asleep.
I look under her bed.
No chip packets for the past 8 weeks.
So far, so good.
Size 5 Aqua Chucks xx
Mmm Corn Fritters. Avocado. Corn Relish. Chips. Chips.
But we don't want the hot chips.
Oooooh. Hot chips. Yes we do. Oh but maybe not.
Ok. Ploughmans Platter it is then. No Chips with that.
They chatter. Laugh. Giggle. Whinge about things a bit. Ask each other questions about husbands, babies, children and dating.
J ordered a bowl of hot chips to share! Seagull! Can we seagull?! Yes. Look who we are with! Of course we can! Hurrah!
Stop. Before we start. We need to establish some ground rules here. How many?
Who cares! I feeeeellllll like hot chips! They look so crispy too!
Cut it out. 5.
10.
8. My last offer. And if they get dessert Missy. One word. No.
Fine. I like how my black skinnies aren't as skinny anymore anyway!
Me xx
Fuchsia Boots xxx